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Umpires - Quotes and Quotations

At her first game of cricket - What are the butchers for?
Pauline Chase
I cannot for the life of me see why the umpires, the only two people on a cricket field who are not going to get grass stains on their knees, are the only two people allowed to wear dark trousers.
Catherine Whitehorn
If there were an Olympic event for running backwards, I would be the obvious favourite.
Harold 'Dickie' Bird Not Out (1978)
It is rather suitable for umpires to dress like dentists, since one of their tasks is to draw stumps.
John Arlott
My only complaint with 'Dickie' Bird is that he requires a degree of certainty that is almost neurotic; like the man who has to keep going to the front door to make certain that he's locked it.
Mike Brearley
Umpire Harold Bird, having a wonderful time, signalling everything in the world, including stopping traffic coming on from behind.
John Arlott

 

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